We put too much value on seeking inner peace and it’s making us more stressed. 

I know, I sounds crazy coming from a person that teaches, mentors and coaches around holistic wellbeing, but let me explain:

I have worked with hundreds of people that, in one way or another, feels anxious and stressed out about life.  Some of them might have past trauma that is still affecting them. Some might deal with feelings of unworthiness that’s causing them to feel stressed, and some might feel out of control of the curveballs life has thrown at them. 

Whatever is supposedly robbing them of their inner peace, most of them can’t find it even if they are seemingly doing the ‘right things’ such as meditating, yoga, fasting etc. Why?? Because most of them are looking at inner peace the wrong way.


“You will get in life what you focus on, not what your cognitive brain wants.”


  • Seeking inner peace causes us to need to take action, which is the opposite of inner peace 
  • Seeking inner peace makes us believe we don’t have it yet, and we need to find it
  • Seeking peace puts emphasis on the idea there is something missing in our lives, something that’s illusive and hard to sustain


So here’s the thing: 

When we look for something that’s missing our brain does a funny thing, it starts to look for more of what we don’t have. In other words, when you look for what’s missing, it focuses on the missing part, not the thing we are trying to adding our lives.  Let me explain it further:  Imagine you have lost your phone and you are not sure if you have dropped it or if it’s been stolen. You look for it everywhere but you still can’t find it. You start to panic. Your mind keeps telling that’s it,  you have lost you phone and now it will be in the hands of a thief! How easy do you think it will be to find your lost phone? Even though your lost phone is actually in the house right in from of your eyes you might not see it! Why?? Because you are looking for something that’s ‘lost’ and your brain gets fixated on the ‘lost’ part, not the finding part. This is the same reason that I encourage people that wants to “loose weight” to reframe this into something the would LIKE in their lives, not get rid of. Or when someone wants to stop smoking it’s more powerful to focus on the RESULT they want after they are smoke free instead of the ‘stop smoking’ part. Instead of trying to become smoke-free we are looking forward to breathing fresh air. See where I am getting at here? 

This is why the law of attraction hardly ever works, or always works depending on how you look at it.

So with this in mind:

Would it be better to try and FIND inner peace or to TUNE INTO inner peace?

Would it be better to SEEK inner peace or to CONNECT to the inner peace that is already inside of you?

If you truly want to be at peace, stop looking for it like it’s something you don’t already have. Peace is always available, you just need to lean into it. Imagine yourself as a radio but instead of a normal radio that needs to tune into the frequency outside, the frequencies you tune into every day exists inside of you.

So the question now is: Which frequency are YOU tuned into?

Madelaine 💛

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