The Emotional Weight of Female Leadership in a Male-Dominated World

“As a woman in leadership, I’ve felt the weight of societal expectations more times than I can count. Whether it’s being told I’m ‘too assertive’ or having my decisions questioned simply because I’m a woman, the journey has been anything but easy. But we need to talk about these challenges—not just for ourselves, but for the women who will follow in our footsteps.”

Unfortunately, we still have along way to go when it comes to leadership equality. As women, particularly in leadership roles, we are often faced with challenges that can feel deeply personal—challenges that men in the same positions may never fully understand. From being seen as ‘too assertive’ to constantly feeling the need to prove our worth, it can be emotionally exhausting. If you’ve felt this way, you’re not imagining it—these challenges are real and have a significant impact on our experience as leaders.

The Gender Gap in Leadership

Australia, where I live, is no stranger to gender inequality, especially in leadership. Studies show that only about 33% of leadership roles are held by women, despite nearly half of the workforce being female. While women are making strides in some industries, the harsh reality is that many still face unconscious biases that favour male leadership styles over female ones.

My Personal Experience: The Emotional Toll of Being a Woman Leader

Throughout my career, I’ve faced countless moments where I’ve had to assert my authority in situations where a male counterpart wouldn’t have faced any resistance. And every time I’ve stood up for myself—whether it’s in business negotiations or setting firm boundaries—I’ve been labelled as ‘greedy’ or ‘too harsh.’

This isn’t unique to me. Women in leadership, particularly those who also happen to be mothers, are often judged more harshly than men. We are expected to juggle nurturing roles at home while being authoritative at work, and when we do stand up for ourselves, we’re frequently criticised in ways that men simply aren’t. It’s an exhausting double standard that takes an emotional toll on many women in leadership.

How This Impacts Creative Entrepreneurs and Holistic Practitioners

For creative entrepreneurs and holistic practitioners—especially those who are women—this challenge can feel even more pronounced. In the creative and holistic fields, women are often expected to be nurturing, intuitive, and empathetic. But when we assert our value or set firm boundaries, we’re labelled as unapproachable or overly demanding.

This creates a constant tension between being true to ourselves and playing by the rules of a male-dominated society. And for many women, it feels like a losing game: if we’re too assertive, we’re criticised; if we’re too soft, we’re overlooked.

In the world of holistic practices and creative entrepreneurship, this bias can be particularly tough. Women are expected to be nurturing and empathetic, yet when we assert our value or set boundaries, we’re seen as less feminine or unapproachable. This constant tension can wear us down, making it hard to lead with confidence.

The Unspoken Barrier: Women Not Supporting Women

It’s important to acknowledge that gender inequality in leadership doesn’t just stem from men undervaluing women—it can also arise from women not supporting one another. Sadly, I’ve witnessed many instances where women have been quick to judge other women, especially when they stand firm in their authority or pursue ambitious goals.

We are often conditioned by society to compete with each other rather than uplift and collaborate. This competitiveness can lead to moments of judgment, where women criticise one another’s decisions, leadership style, or even success. It’s a subtle, but significant, part of the broader challenge we face.

“I’ve seen women turn against each other in ways that only add to the pressure of being in leadership roles. Whether it’s judging another woman’s choices or questioning her authority, this lack of solidarity can be just as damaging as any bias from men.”

To overcome this, we need to consciously choose to lift each other up rather than tearing each other down. When we support other women—by celebrating their achievements, giving them credit, and offering encouragement—we create a more inclusive and empowering environment for all of us.

The Importance of Gender Balance in Leadership

Achieving a balance in leadership between men and women isn’t just about equality—it’s about creating better outcomes for businesses, organisations, and society as a whole. Studies show that diverse leadership teams perform better because they bring different perspectives, styles, and approaches to problem-solving.

But this balance will only happen if men actively support their female counterparts. Men can make a difference by:

– Listening without judgment when women assert themselves, and recognising that assertiveness is not aggression.
– Championing women in leadership roles, promoting their contributions, and giving them credit where it’s due.
– Calling out bias when they see it—whether it’s in meetings, hiring practices, or general workplace culture.

It’s also important to note that achieving this balance benefits men too. When leadership is more balanced, everyone works in an environment where different perspectives are valued, and this leads to more innovative solutions and stronger outcomes.

How Women Can Stand Strong

For women in leadership, it’s vital to own your worth and stay true to your values, even when it feels difficult. Here are some strategies that have worked for me and for other female leaders I know:

– Embrace your leadership style: You don’t need to act like a man to be respected. Lead with authenticity and integrity.
– Set boundaries without guilt: As women, we often feel guilty for asserting ourselves or setting limits. But boundaries are essential for self-respect and long-term success.
– Build your tribe: Surround yourself with supportive women and men who understand the challenges you face and can offer solidarity and advice. Join networks or create your own circle of like-minded leaders.
– Know your value: Don’t downplay your strengths or your contributions. You have worked hard to get to where you are, and your perspective and leadership matter.

Together, We Can Change the Story

As women in leadership, we are paving the way for future generations. Yes, it’s challenging, but it’s also a privilege to stand at the forefront of change. Together, with the support of both men and women, we can create a world where leadership is about ability and vision, not gender.

We don’t need special treatment—we need equal treatment. And with that equality, we can create stronger businesses, more creative projects, and a better, more balanced world for everyone.

How do you notice the gender gap?

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REFERENCES:

Catalyst. (2020). Why diversity and inclusion matter: Financial performance. https://www.catalyst.org/research/why-diversity-and-inclusion-matter/
European Institute for Gender Equality. (2021). Gender equality index 2021: Sweden. https://eige.europa.eu/gender-equality-index/2021/country/SE
Forbes. (2020). Why women don’t always support other women (And how to fix it). https://www.forbes.com/sites/ellevate/2020/02/10/why-women-dont-always-support-other-women-and-how-to-fix-it
Harvard Business Review. (2019). Research: Women score higher than men in most leadership skills. https://hbr.org/2019/06/research-women-score-higher-than-men-in-most-leadership-skills
McKinsey & Company. (2020). Women in the workplace 2020. https://www.mckinsey.com/featured-insights/diversity-and-inclusion/women-in-the-workplace
Victoria State Government. (n.d.). Gender inequality affects everyone. https://www.vic.gov.au/gender-inequality-affects-everyone
Workplace Gender Equality Agency. (2022). Australia’s gender equality scorecard. https://www.wgea.gov.au/publications/australias-gender-equality-scorecard